Tell me about your walls. No, not the four surrounding the room where you are reading this story. Instead, I mean your bipolar walls, the ones you build to protect yourself and others.
If you have bipolar disorder, you’re skilled at building walls. You learn quickly how to build walls around your heart to protect yourself from the hurt that love can bring. But in the process, you also close yourself off from the happiness and joy that love can offer.
It is only when you let go of your fears and open your heart completely that you can experience the true magic of love. So if you’re afraid of getting hurt, remember that the only way to avoid pain is to never feel love. And what a sad life that would be.
The older I get, the more walls I can see around me. I’ve been building walls for so long that I do it by instinct. The walls go up before I even think about them, but those walls distance me from people.
In the first months of the pandemic, I slipped into severe bipolar depression. During those painful months, I wondered why no one was checking on me. Where were my friends? Why didn’t anyone see my pain?
Then I realized, they couldn’t see my pain because I refused to show it. My walls had grown so thick that most of the people in my life no longer knew the real me. They knew the smile, the mask, the impenetrable wall.
Bipolar disorder can make it difficult to maintain close relationships. The fear of abandonment and rejection can lead you to build walls around our hearts, making it harder for others to get close to you. But it is important to remember that love is worth the risk.
Without love, life is empty and meaningless. So if you are afraid of getting hurt, take a chance and let someone into your heart. You might just find the happiness and love that you’ve been searching for all along.
Until next time, keep fighting.
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Banish your negative thinking with the free 30 Days of Positivity Email Course. Link in bio. https://speakingbipolar.com/30days
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